Are Your Feelings Valid?
Posted on February 04 2020
Do you consider yourself an anxious person?
I definitely do.
Most days I feel crippling anxiety just about every second of each 24-hour day. But, what's funny to me is that most of the things that people are anxious about - I am not.
In school I never got nervous before an exam, I have never broken a sweat at even the thought of public speaking, I am cool as a cucumber when it comes to doctors and I feel that I am pretty laid back when it comes to making big life decisions. Yet in everyday life I still feel like I am in a constant state of panic.
One of my most anxious thoughts throughout my regular days is that I will get "spooked" by something. Just the thought that someone might knock on a door of a room I am in or that my cell phone might make a noise that I am not expecting and that I might jump at the unexpected noise frightens the hell out of me! It is one of those things that I have no idea where the fear comes from. I have not always been this way but it seems to get worse with time.
Whatever you feel and whenever you feel it - Your feelings are valid.
A lot of us, including myself, have grown up in an environment where feelings were minimized, denied, or sometimes brushed aside. Feelings are real. Growing up I almost always thought that my intense emotions and feelings were wrong or irrational. And sometimes they were but that did not mean that they weren't real.
One of the most frustrating things that I can think of is feeling something very strongly and with much emotion only to be told - "That is dumb." or "You shouldn't be upset." I know that there are usually good intentions behind these types of remarks but I cannot think of a time when it has made me feel better to be told that I should feel something else.
No matter what someone else thinks about our circumstances or how we should respond to things, our feelings are not imagined. You don't have to pretend or suppress your emotions. They are real and they are valid.
I will say it again and again and again... YOUR FEELINGS ARE REAL AND THEY ARE VALID!
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk - LOL jk!
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